On a circle in life…

For the last several months, I’ve had to learn what it means to be alone. I’ve spent a significant amount of time alone recently. Sometimes that’s good, sometimes it’s bad. For a long time, I’ve thought that “being alone” was kind of a bad thing, like something was wrong if I was alone (or if anyone was, for that matter), but what I’m coming to realize is that being alone is kind of refreshing. Almost necessary.

I’m not prone to spending time alone. I like being around people. I like noise. I like distractions. So in the last few months, this being alone thing has taken it’s toll on me. I don’t have people calling me up very frequently to hang out with me or just to talk. So I find myself spending a lot of time working out and watching TV…and more recently, I’ve been going to the local brewery and reading for hours on end. I was never one to really go out by myself…seeing movies alone or going to dinner by myself or taking me out for a drink just seemed awkward. Now I relish in it. About a month ago, I took myself to see a movie because a) I could and b) I wanted to see if I could really do it. Turns out, it was actually a lot of fun! I spend a ton of time with my dogs…we wrestle and go for walks to the park and play outside. They are guaranteed happiness.

So while I’ve found ways to enjoy being alone, I also miss NOT being alone. It’s nice to have someone around to talk to or hang out with or have adventures with. It’s nice to having someone to go to the movies with and make dinner reservations for.

I think there’s an interesting cyclical balance that’s struck between solitude and companionship. Being alone teaches me that I need to be around people, while being around people shows me that alone-time is good and sometimes necessary.

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